Baby Steps

There are mornings I get up, like today, and don’t know how I’m going to make it. The chronic pain I’ve had (along with the PTSD, anxiety attacks, and depression) cripples me and limits me in ways that make me feel down before I even get up. I finally have this wonderful opportunity to work…

Rate this:

Read More

Nameless energy

I find that when I don’t write for several days I have a tendency to wake-up with a nameless energy that feels like anxiety, or panic.  That has been one of the reasons I’ve wanted to write my whole life (literally and figuratively).  Two nights ago we (my husband, sixteen-year-old son, and I) spent a…

Rate this:

Read More

Making peace with pain.

Constant physical pain in some part or all of my body has been my reality since about eight months after my son was diagnosed with Ataxia-Telangiectasia in July of 2000.  It started with pain in my arms, then my legs, which led to all over body pain.  I saw many doctors, had many tests, and…

Rate this:

Read More

Fatal

When your child is diagnosed with a fatal condition at the age of 3, your life is changed irrevocably.  Hearing they will lose the ability to walk, feed themselves, and be independent is hard enough, but putting a limit on the number of years you will be together is catastrophic.  The neurologist tried to put…

Rate this:

Read More

Broken

There is no question that I inherited some mental illness from the gene pool that determined my being.  Working with it has been one of the biggest challenges of my life, and continues to be.  Since before I was born a message was embedded in my consciousness that something about me was “broken”, fragmented, not whole.…

Rate this:

Read More

How do you mourn?

I would love to hear feedback from anyone who happens to read my blog about the question that serves as it’s title.  Some losses are immediate and final – for example the death of a parent.  Other losses just go on and on, like looking at the sweet face of my middle child every day…

Rate this:

Read More